Something has been bothering me lately.
Why does social media seem so determined to convince wives that we should hate being wives? Or stay-at-home moms that we should be mad about being stay-at-home moms?
I don’t know. Maybe I’m missing something.
But this is not a labor dispute.
My husband and I are on the same team.
We decided together that he would work and provide financially for our family, and I would stay home and take care of our kids and our home.
And I like it that way.
That doesn’t mean I like every single thing that comes with my job. I certainly don’t wake up excited about laundry. And I don’t think my husband wakes up every morning thinking, “Man, I cannot WAIT to work today.”
He loves providing for us.
I love being home with our kids.
Neither one of those statements means we love every single thing required to do it.
Maybe it’s the former athlete in me, but I keep thinking about basketball.
A team doesn’t work because five people are all trying to play the exact same position.
Somebody has to be the guard. Somebody has to be in the post. Somebody has to shoot the ball. Somebody has to rebound it.
One isn’t less important because they’re doing something different.
They’re trying to win the same game.
That’s how I look at our marriage.
Why would I need my husband to be equally involved in remembering library books?
Imagine this man is working at 11 a.m. and suddenly calls me:
“Hey, don’t forget the boys need to return their library books.”
Sir.
Go back to work. 😂
That’s my job.
Just like there are things on his plate that I don’t carry because they’re his job.
And somehow social media can make you feel like you should be keeping score.
He didn’t do the dishes.
He didn’t know about that appointment.
I’m more involved in the kids’ schedules.
He used the wrong tone when he came home tired.
Okay?
There are days I use the wrong tone too.
There are days I’m tired. There are days he’s tired. There are days I probably don’t appreciate everything he’s carrying, and I’m sure there are days he doesn’t see everything I’m carrying either.
We’re people.
I don’t want a nine-to-five.
Apparently, I looked at that option and thought, “No thanks, I’ll take the 24/7 position.” 😂
And I genuinely love it.
I’m allowed to complain about laundry and still love being the one who does it.
I’m allowed to be exhausted by my children and still be thankful I’m home raising them.
And I’m allowed to have a husband who doesn’t carry the same responsibilities I do without deciding that means he isn’t carrying his share.
We don’t need identical roles.
We need to be on the same team.
I’ll rebound. He can shoot.
Just somebody please remember the library books.
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