The Journal of an Honest Mom

This morning my oldest informed me that he has four girlfriends at school.

Four.

I wasn’t sure if I should be concerned or impressed.

So, naturally, I asked both of my boys, “What is a girlfriend?”

Without missing a beat they answered, “A girl who’s a friend.”

Simple enough. Crisis avoided.

Then Child 1 added, “…and she’s pretty.”

Well… that changed things a little.

So I decided to ask another question.

“Then am I Daddy’s girlfriend?”

Child 2 immediately yelled, “YES!”

Child 1 looked at me. Thought about it for a second.

Then very seriously said,

“Well…”

“…you’re not really pretty.”

Excuse me?

I have spent years keeping this child alive. I have changed diapers that should have qualified as biohazards. I have sacrificed sleep. I have shared my snacks. I have even let him have the last cinnamon roll.

And this is the thanks I get.

The funny thing about kids is they aren’t trying to hurt your feelings. They’re just trying to make sense of the world.

In his little six-year-old mind, girlfriends are girls who are friends… and they’re pretty. I just didn’t fit into his very scientific definition.

Thankfully, Daddy disagrees.

Or at least he better.

Motherhood has a funny way of keeping us humble. Sometimes it’s stepping on a toy barefoot. Sometimes it’s finding mystery stains on every shirt you own.

And sometimes your own child looks you dead in the eyes and lets you know that, as far as he’s concerned…

…you’re not really pretty.

Kids really do keep you grounded.